What Matchmakers Don’t Want You To Know
The truth behind traditional & high-end matchmakers. A message from NEM founder, Joshua Pompey
The truth behind traditional & high-end matchmakers. A message from NEM founder, Joshua Pompey
We’ve all seen shows like the Millionaire Matchmaker on television right? Patti Stanger provides her clients with a buffet of beautiful singles to choose from. Sometimes it works out. Sometimes it doesn’t. But the ending is always the same for those who don’t meet that special someone. If they continue to follow the rules and deserve love, they will have plenty of opportunities in the future.
Must be nice right? Not so much. Unfortunately, things are not always as perfect as they appear on television. In real life, matchmaking services are often dishonest, deceiving, and rarely leave clients walking away happy. In this article I am going to expose everything matchmakers don’t want you to know when signing up, and why you should avoid traditional matchmaking services at all costs.You’re a 55 year old man and want a bubbly, curvy blonde, who loves to cook? You got it! You’re a 37 year old woman who wants a driven, successful man, who doesn’t play games and wants to have kids within 3 years? Sure no problem!
If only life were that simple. When you sit down sit down for your initial consultation with a matchmaking service, you will be told just about anything you want to hear. The harsh reality? Matchmaking services rarely, if ever, have the matches you are requesting. I’ll never forget the first time I spoke to a matchmaker over the phone. This was several years ago, and I was pitching a story idea for the Huffington Post. I thought it would be a fun idea to match me up with one of her clients, and in exchange, I would write a story about my experiences. Keep in mind, her matchmaking service charged $10,000 for paying members. After 15 minutes of her inquiring about the type of woman I would like to be set up with, she inexplicably made the following confession, “The truth is, most matchmaking companies don’t really match up their clients with what they ask for. They are super demanding and we usually just set them up with whoever we could find.” I couldn’t believe it. Why she admitted this I will never know, but the moral implications of this confession were disturbing to say the least. Over the years I came to find out that this was far from an isolated case, nor was it limited to sites that charge $10,000. I have had dozens of clients inquire about my services after feeling scammed and burnt by even the alleged “best matchmaking services“, claiming that none of their matches were anything even close to what they had asked for upon signing up (among other issues). Believe it or not, some of the biggest horror stories were from those who paid upwards of $50,000 for a membership. The truth is, when you sit down with a traditional matchmaking service, you will be made to feel understood and special. You will be bombarded with alleged success stories and claims of expertise. You will hear about unique methods that make their service different. You will be assured that their company is exclusive with their clients. The reality? Signing a client is big time sale, and matchmakers will tell you just about anything they want to hear until they close that deal. Bottom line: If you have a credit card, you are going to be promised the world.Not only do you rarely get an actual “match” from a matchmaker, but you will often receive less than a handful of dates over the course of a year. You will be told that this is because the process of finding a true match takes time, hard work, and patience. The reality is that they don’t have enough matches in their data base and are just stalling.
But let’s just pretend that these matchmaking services actually did have the types of matches you were initially promised. No matter how perfect a match appears on paper, there is no way of predicting chemistry until meeting in real life. At the end of the day, finding love is a numbers game. In most cases, you have to find a lot of matches on paper, and go out with a lot of people before finding that special someone. Matchmakers fail on both accounts. With less than a handful of dates in one year, the odds are far from on your side.Part of the appeal of hiring a matchmaker is having a true professional dedicated to your success at all times. When you sign up you will be made to feel like a king or queen, with matchmakers declaring their undying dedication to your success. The reality? You are just another number in a rotation.
Think about it from a logical point if view. If matchmaking services are typically providing 3 or 4 dates over the course of six months, is your matchmaker really sitting there all day long, endlessly searching for your perfect match day after day? Common sense would argue that if this were the case, you would have a heck of a lot more than a handful of dates in a year.If the average matchmaker is providing 3 to 5 dates, and taking $10,000 or more for a membership, think about what the average cost for just one date is? You are talking thousands of dollars for one date with someone that, as we already talked about, is likely nothing like what you asked for. Think you could could find a cheaper service to roll the dice on? Guess again. If you are playing with fire on a $10,000 dollar membership, finding a service that charges less is like running into a burning building doused in gasoline! You might as well set your money on fire.
I’ve worked with everyone from CEO’s that haves salaries in the millions, to hard working professionals who make around six figures. But I don’t care how much money you are making. If your average cost for one date is in the thousands, you are being grossly overcharged.When Patti Stanger sets up her millionaires with people who aren’t even paying for a membership, what do you think their actual motivation is? It would be naive to not say these people aren’t lured in by the prospect of money and wealth. Even if you are choosing a much cheaper service, your dates will know you have money, making gold diggers much more prominent, and to top it off, will likely wonder if you are desperate for spending thousands of dollars on dates.
Let’s provide another example. Suppose the matchmaking service only sets you up with other paying clients. You are a 40 year old woman, who is fun, pretty, and has an all around great personality. Do you think the 45 year old match you are requesting is going to want to date you, or is he going to feel entitled due to all the money he has spent, and want to date a 30-35 year old? My point is, matchmaking services may sound great in theory, but often times, the motivations of those you are trying to date are far from beneficial.The truth is, these days anyone can become a matchmaker, virtually overnight. If you do a few google searches, have a credit card, and set up a website, you can buy enough certifications and credibility within a few hours to create the image of a reputable matchmaker. In the Internet age, it is literally that easy.
Better yet, go on LinkedIn right now and search for dating coaches and matchmakers. It would probably take you hours to sort through the hundreds of wannabe’s, pretenders, and eccentric people that are fighting for your hard earned cash.Think of how many people you have ever met in your life that got married off a matchmaker, then ask yourself the question, how successful could these matchmaking services actually be? I know I’ve never encountered a single couple that met through a matchmaker. Be assured that you will hear plenty of success stories. But be careful what you choose to believe. Most are far from real.
Matchmaking services will make plenty of proclamations about their unique formulas for success. The truth is, there is no magic formula. When it comes to dating, the only formula that works is going out on a lot of dates with people that seem to have similar interests, backgrounds, motivations, and relationship goals, until that perfect chemistry is found. Unfortunately, matchmakers do a very poor job at providing any of these things.
Here at Next Evolution Matchmaking, we take outdated methods of traditional matchmaking, and bring them to the online dating world of the 21st century. Every week you will be found at least 15 potential matches, as we find you exponentially more dates, better dates, and higher quality dates on a weekly basis, without you having to do any work whatsoever.
Click here to learn what our amazing and revolutionary service does, why we are superior to traditional matchmaking services in every possible way, and most importantly, why no client has ever requested a return on our service.