Hiring a Matchmaker? 8 Questions They Don’t Want You To Ask

By Joshua Pompey

Browse around the Internet and you will find that I am extremely outspoken about traditional matchmakers. I won’t mince words – over the past decade I have found matchmaking agencies to be deceitful and predatory on almost unimaginable levels at times. Protecting single men and women from predatory matchmakers is something that I will continue to do until the day I retire.

With that said, sometimes it’s a smart idea to do the homework on your own as opposed to just taking my word for it. So if you are thinking of hiring a matchmaker, ask your prospective matchmaking agency the questions outlined below. If they can’t provide satisfying answers, you may want to reconsider the investment before handing over your credit card.

1. How many dates do you provide?

Finding love isn’t easy. Unless you are very lucky, dating is a process that often requires meeting a whole lot of people before finding a meaningful connection.

Unfortunately most traditional matchmakers only provide 4 – 5 dates over the course of an entire membership.

Unfortunately, most traditional matchmakers only provide 3-6 dates over the course of an entire membership (memberships typically only last 6 months to a year). If your matchmaker can’t guarantee you at least 12 high-quality dates, your odds of success will be extremely low.

2. Can you guarantee my matches meet my preferences?

Often times matchmakers guarantee dates that meet your preferences, only to provide the complete opposite after signing up. This is mainly because they don’t actually have or can’t find the caliber of dates they promise.

Before hiring a matchmaker, ask if they could assure you in the contract that your preferences (height, age, religion, interests, etc.) are met. If they refuse, it gives them free rein to just meet a quota on the amount of dates they provide, with little regard for how well your dates match up to your preferences.

3. If I hire you as a matchmaker, how often will we be in communication?

Matchmakers are notorious for being extremely attentive prior to enrollment. Once they have your payment, they slowly fade into the background, dodge your calls, and dedicate a minimal amount of attention to your needs as they redirect their focus to their next big sale.

A matchmaker worth hiring won’t ignore you. They will be in communication with you on a daily basis, constantly providing updates of the steps they are taking to ensure your success. This is why my company (you can learn more about our modern spin on matchmaking here) provides daily reports to our clients five days a week, in addition to allowing unlimited texting access. Communication is essential to any great relationship.

4. What are your incentives for taking me seriously?

When you hire a traditional matchmaking agency, they take payments upfront and do not offer refunds.

If matchmaking agencies already have all your money in advance, where is the motivation and incentive for them to work their absolute hardest

If matchmaking agencies already have all your money in advance, where is the motivation and incentive for them to work their absolute hardest every single day to find you someone? If you ask them what their incentive is to work hard for you and they can’t provide anything other than some variation of, “trust me,” you may be setting yourself up for a financial disaster.

5. Do you have verified reviews online?

Search some of the biggest matchmaking companies in the world and you’ll find a plethora of 1 star reviews, class action lawsuits, and horror stories (It’s Just Lunch is a great example). Other agencies have reviews that are so impossibly flattering, they don’t even come close to passing the smell test on being legitimate. Then there are agencies that post pictures of their success stories. But ask yourself the question – would couples who met through a high-end matchmaker really want this information to be public? How do you know these aren’t just friends of the matchmaker that you are thinking about hiring?

While it’s not always easy to separate the real reviews from the fake reviews, always look for verified reviews before hiring a matchmaker and read them with a discerning eye. When I want clients to know they can trust me, I always direct them to this verified review site.

6. Will my dates also be paying members?

Suppose you sign up for a service where you are paying for a membership, but your dates aren’t. Think about the awkward dynamic this creates. You will be sitting across from someone who knows you spent thousands of dollars just to meet them, while they are sitting there for free. This instantly puts you in a massive hole when it comes to sparking attraction.

Most matchmakers will recruit your dates straight from dating sites or random locations in your city because they don’t have members to set you up with. While you are investing your hard earned money into meeting someone, your dates might simply be there to have a fun experience that they could tell their friends about. Asking a matchmaker where your dates will come from is a critical piece of information.

7. Is hiring a matchmaker realistic for my age?

Here at Next Evolution Matchmaking, it’s rare that we don’t think we could help someone. But when we speak to someone who has needs we don’t think we could fill, we tell them the truth. Why? The last thing we want to do is sign up someone up who winds up resenting us down the road for not delivering great results.

The truth is, even if conventional matchmakers worked with complete integrity, they inherently won’t work for certain age groups, especially for women over 40. When you hire a matchmaker, be sure to ask them how realistic the process is for your age and gender? If they over promise or paint nothing but a rosy picture with no honesty, that is a very bad sign.

8. Why should I hire a matchmaker instead of using dating APPS and dating sites?

When hiring a matchmaker, ask them why you should choose that path? Do people even really meet this way anymore? Did they ever? Have you ever known someone who met this way?

The truth of the matter is, just about everyone on the planet who is single these days, regardless of age, is on a dating APP or online dating site. This is why my company goes straight to the source, combining traditional matchmaking with online dating sites and APPS, for a process that actually works.

Looking for a perfect alternative to hiring a matchmaking agency?

Here’s the thing, not ALL aspects of traditional matchmaking are bad. They just need to be modernized to the current technology and fast paced world we live in. This is why I created Next Evolution Matchmaking, where we merge traditional matchmaking techniques with the modern world of online dating.

Through our methods our clients have found meaningful relationships in an average timespan of two months into their membership. To learn more about how our process works, click here now or click the link below!

Learn Exactly What We Do!