Online Dating Tips for Men

The 10 Online Dating Tips that Women Wish You Knew

10 Critical Online Dating Tips for Men

By NEM Founder, Joshua Pompey

Over the past decade I have been in contact with more female online daters than just about any man walking this earth.  I’ve interviewed them.  I’ve coached them.  I’ve written their emails.   And well, let’s just say I’ve dated more than my fair share of women online before meeting my significant other.  But if there is one thing all this experience has provided me with, it is a ridiculously extensive understanding and knowledge of online dating from the female perspective.

Well here’s the good news for all you guys out there.  Attracting an amazing woman online isn’t even remotely as difficult as you might think once you understand online dating from the female point of view.  In this article I am going to provide inside access to some of the most important knowledge I have acquired working with women over the years, with this list of 10 online dating tips every woman wishes you knew.   Pay attention men, because I am literally giving away nearly a decades worth of my most valuable insight.

For the best online dating tips for women, visit this page.

Online Dating Tips all Men Should Know #1  

When emailing, focus on the most unique commonality you can find

You both like going to the movies and traveling?  Big deal.  So does everyone else.  But you both have a passion for David Lynch films and also have family in Sicily?  Now you have planted the seed that you are someone special and have a unique connection when you reference these things in your opening email.

In this day and age where everybody seems the same on paper, the more you focus on a unique commonality, the more a woman will feel as if you have an instant connection.  How do you find these unique commonalities?  Use the keyword search and performed advanced searches to save time.


Online Dating Tips All Men Should Know #2

Nothing get’s past a mediocre profile

If there is one thing I can assure you about every woman I’ve ever encountered, none of them will write you back if you don’t learn how to write an online dating profile that captivates their interest.  The online dating profile is where women will size you up from head to toe.  Is he interesting?  Is he open-minded?  Does he have ambition?  Can he make me laugh?

Within seconds a woman will scan your profile and determine whether or not you are relationship potential.   In addition, woman naturally feel more attraction towards a man’s internal qualities than his physical, and this is where you will make them shine.  A great profile should be your number one priority before anything else you do online.

Online Dating Tips All Men Should Know #3  

Women do not want you to compliment them

Do you know what the first thing a woman says to me when she receives a message loaded with compliments?  “He seems a little desperate,” or “that guy is creepy.”  Believe me when I tell you, 99% of the woman I’ve talked to over the past ten years have this reaction.

Just think about it from a woman’s perspective.  If you had a complete stranger fawning over how amazing you are in several different ways, even though you’ve never even met, would you be a little weirded out?  Get to know a woman first and save the compliments for once you are already involved.  And NEVER compliment a woman’s physical appearance online.  This is an absolute death sentence to your dating life.

Online dating tips all men should know #4

Laughter is your number one weapon

Pending you present yourself correctly in your profile, if you make a woman laugh with your writing, you are all but guaranteed a response.  Women receive so many boring emails every day, and read so many cliche profiles, that when someone actually comes in and makes them laugh, it is like receiving an early birthday present.  

Nearly every day, when I work with a woman who is choosing between multiple guys online, she tells me she likes (insert name) the best because he seems funny, and this always becomes the guy that gets first priority for a date. Humor is the most valuable asset you have for sparking interest online.

Online Dating Tips all Men Should Know #5

Never make an email feel like homework 

You are driven.  You are well-rounded.  You have a passion for life.  And you just wrote an email that is three paragraphs long, with four questions.  DELETE.

Let’s face it.  We live in an attention deficit world and just about everyone is always on the go these days, especially if you live in or near a big city.  If you want a response, keep the response time reasonable, and limit your emails to one question each, two max.

Online Dating Tips for Men #6

Lead the conversation properly

As a man, it is your job to lead.  The easier you make it for a woman to respond, the more likely she will.  If you end an email without asking a woman a question, she likely won’t respond.  This puts all the work on her.  If you simply say “what’s up?” or “how are you?,” you are technically asking a question, but what is she supposed to say, “nothing much, you?”

These questions still put all the work on her to think of something to say, not to mention, are mind-numbingly boring.  When you write emails, ask questions that you know will be interesting, and attempt to lead the conversation down an interesting path that will get her excited to respond.

For online dating email examples and a free tutorial, click here.

Online Dating Tips all Men Should Know #7

Bad Grammar is a Massive Turnoff

I can vouch for the fact that women care about grammar and spelling much more than you might think.  Fair or not, women make judgements about your intelligence and overall work ethic in life, based upon your grammar, the same way an employer would judge you if you handed in a resume filled with errors.  Proof read, proof read, and proof read some more.

Online Dating Tips all Men Should Know #8

Never copy and paste emails to multiple women

If you want to try this, go right ahead.  You may get one response for every twenty five or thirty emails.  But if you want to date beautiful women of quality, avoid this at all costs.  Regardless of how funny or interesting your canned email is, women can always tell, and if they think they are just another number in a number’s game, you will instantly be deleted.

Online Dating Tips for Men #9

Women are DYING for someone interesting to come along 

When I log onto women’s accounts every day, you can’t even imagine how boring the emails are.  And when they aren’t mind-numbingly boring, they are filled with red flags.  Women get a lot of attention online, and most of it is absolutely awful.  If you can even manage to be remotely interesting, you will stand out from the competition like you can’t even imagine, and all these bad emails from other men will serve as your greatest asset to make you shine.  Make the effort to be that guy, and I assure you, it will pay off in dividends.


Online Dating Tip #10

Move the conversation to the phone quickly

There’s nothing woman get more frustrated by then when a guy endlessly emails them online without asking for a phone number.  Wait too long and a woman will move on to the next guy.  At the same time, ask too quick, and she will disappear as well.   So when is the right time?  Once comfort is established, and she seems into you, go for it.  This should usually be accomplished in three to four responses, if the emails are of a standard length and actual conversation has taken place.  The longer the responses on her end, the more interested you can assume she is, and the quicker you can go for a number.

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